Using appropriate doubt to be kinder to yourself

‘Appropriate Doubt’ is a pattern shared by many of the exceptional people we have had the privilege to model. One of the ways they use this pattern results in them being kinder to themselves and naturally more resilient.

Typically, when we make a decision, and things don’t turn out as anticipated, we often look back and regret not taking one of the alternative options. The crazy assumption hidden in this retrospective regret is that the other options would have turned out exactly as anticipated!!!!. We can get stuck in an energy depleting and depressing loop of thinking if only I had….

In contrast, the exceptional individuals we have analysed apply ‘appropriate doubt’ when reflecting on their decisions. When they contemplate other prior options and imagined outcomes, they instantly begin ‘applying appropriate’ doubt to them and begin anticipating how those options could have also gone astray.

They start from the reality of where they are now. If they do return to a prior option, they do so with a focus on the current situation and the lessons learnt from the path they did take, believing those lessons will be important and useful in the future. Plus, through appropriate doubt, they step forward on the new path with the possible pitfalls anticipated and planned for.

Perhaps give it a try.